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Tips and Resources for Coming Out to your Roommate


  • Coming out is a personal decision and a process. It is important that you come out when you are ready to do so.
  • Let your roommate get to know you first.
  • When talking to your roommate,do not be defensive. Be patient and calm.
  • If you decide to come out and do not feel comfortable doing it alone, talk to your R.A. or a C.A.
  • You may also talk to your Complex Coordinator if a situation seems out of control.
  • Go to a BILAGA meeting to meet allies and talk about coming out to your roommate.
  • If you are uncertain how your roommate might react, come out several days before room change. Room change is usually 2 weeks after classes start. If things do not work out, see the Director of Residential Services to talk about a room change.
  • If you are feeling alone, there are allies and people all over campus to give you moral support. You can send an email to bilaga@wpi.edu.

Things to Consider When Your Roommate Comes Out to You

Despite what your feelings may be at the moment, try to remember that it wasn't necessarily easy for your roommate to disclose this information to you. You may both be feeling equally uncomfortable or uneasy. Be open and honest about your feelings while also being sure to maintain respectful relations with your roommate. Sometimes backgrounds and values of people are different. In our diverse world, it is important to be respectful of others and to learn more about each person as an individual.   Be sure to respect both similarities and differences. If you believe this situation might conflict with your educational experience because of your background and personal beliefs, talk to your roommate, R.A., C.A.,  or a member of the Residential Services Staff. If you have questions about persons who are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered, check resources and information on this site; meet with a counselor at the West Street House, or talk with a friend/staff member at the Office of Diversity Programs. It is important to be respectful toward all individuals regardless of age, race, ethnicity, gender, ability, national origin, religion, appearance, sexual orientation, veteran status or additional individual differences. This is what being a good citizen, leader or ally is all about.

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